I’m going on holiday.
I know what you’re thinking. A holiday during the season? Is this normal? The answer is no and this will never happen again. People who work for me who read this, don’t ask. But by some universal grace and a really nice boss I’ll be out of town for a month, so I thought I’d make 10 bold predictions about what will happen while I’m out of the NRL loop.
1. The Cowboys and Broncos will be good.
I'm sorry, I need at least one of these to be right. Backing these two is kind of like backing Phar Lap in the Melbourne Cup. Despite having lost their games last weekend I really don’t think Origin is going to halt their progress too much either.
2. Fans will complain about The Bunker approximately 394,502 times.
The number may be slightly off but the sentiment isn't. One thing that's guaranteed in rugby league year after year is fans everywhere think their team is getting dudded and the people getting blamed this season are the poor blokes in The Bunker. Let's not forget they get it right far more times than they get it wrong.
3. New South Wales will ruin it.
Sorry, this already happened. Moving on.
4. Knights fans will still turn up, because they’re great people.
I guess this isn't very bold, either, but after over 13,000 people turned up to watch Newcastle play the Eels last Monday you can safely say that Novocastrians back their team, good or bad. The support may even lead to motivation for a couple more wins.
5. A coach will get sacked.
This would actually be terrible but it's about that time of year when clubs get itchy trigger fingers. This will definitely be followed by a good back-end for the team, who still don’t make the finals, but feel some optimism about where they’re going. Until next season…
6. Cronulla will lose to someone unexpected.
After flying high for so long, it’ll be lower-placed battling team that will hand the Sharks their first loss in a while. It could happen as soon as this upcoming round when they take on the Bulldogs.
7. There will be approximately three more mid-season trades.
Because, why not? June 30 is still a month away and there’s plenty of chatter about player signings. Michael Gordon could be one very soon. Then there’s two to go. Probably. I’m not very good at maths.
8. The Eels will not be able to win 10 from eight.
Still not good at maths but this is impossible, right?
9. The Maroons will have a virus scare in camp during Game Two preparations.
After seeing Cooper Cronk’s ankle post-Origin I, it was pretty clear that he was indeed injured and Queensland weren’t foxing. With a seamless preparation for Game Two however, the rumours will have to start swirling. Let the gross flu and vomiting stories begin.
10. Konrad Hurrell will score at a rate of two tries per game.
New club, new Konrad. We all know this guy can play, but there was obviously something wrong between him and the Warriors. Now that he’s at the Gold Coast he’ll be reinvigorated and the big forwards will get him plenty of room to move.
That’s it! None of these will probably come true but hopefully by then no one remembers. Catch you all in July.